Paintball (not) For Dummies

by michael on March 8, 2011

in Paintball Information,Paintball Tactics

paintball for dummies

In case you hadn’t noticed (shame on you), we’re pretty focussed on playing it safe around here. Paintball’s a lot of fun but what’s not fun is having your day ruined because someone forgot to follow a few simple rules. Paintball for dummies is not a good idea, so read on.

However, there will always be those guys who simply forget one or two key points and instead just go hell for leather will little regard for their own wellbeing. Obviously this could be a real nightmare scenario, but more often than not it’s thankfully just hilarious! Every team usually comes with its own dummy and, if there isn’t one on your team, then it’s probably you. If there’s anyone in your team or group though that perhaps hasn’t quite got the full grasp of the game by the time everyone steps into the game zone, then do the right thing and help them out. Even though no player enters a Bedlam GameZone without detailed safety briefings, some people just absorb information differently and inevitably end up making textbook beginner errors.

Worried that you’re a paintball dummy? Here are some common mistakes every dummy makes at some point or another.

1. Thinks that ‘Canon fodder’ is a genuine team position and volunteers to lead the team into battle
2. Shows up onsite wearing shorts and t-shirt for maximum comfort and flexibility
3. Claims their marker can fire further, faster and more accurately than anyone else’s, but then gets hazy on the figures
4. They see wiping off paint as just another part of the game. Like eating crisps in class, the secret is not to get caught doing it
5. They regularly make fake animal calls as if attracting a moose in heat.
6. Their face is covered in camo paint, even though they’re wearing a bright red jumpsuit
7. They do a victory dance after every direct hit. Or worse still, they shout “I Win!”

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